The Little Things

1 note

Hello, December.

One last calendar flip of the year.  Where have you gone?  I still remember the first day like it was yesterday.  Those first few minutes.  Sure, they were a memorable first few minutes, but still.  I’ve just been thinking about the last 11 months since, well, yesterday.  When my year began, I’m pretty sure I was still going to UWM doing absolutely nothing.  But come August, I transferred to MATC to be in the program I want to be, and that has set me on my path, finally.  When I graduate in 2014, I’ll have a ton of knowledge (they keep telling us we won’t know everything, I KNOW.), job experience and a magnitude of people to help me with my career and life in general.  I made friends in my last semester at UWM and I treasure them dearly.  I’ve also nearly fucked up my friendship with my best friend.  I’ve made a ton of new friends at school, but they haven’t known me nearly long enough to really know.  They see me on a daily basis, but only one of them has ever seen me outside of school, what my life is like outside of our little class.  I guess the biggest thing this year, is the crazy emotional roller coaster of falling in love.  Yesterday, I was thinking that these past 11 months were a complete waste of time when it came to David, but really, it wasn’t a waste.  Frankly, I think meeting him on New Year’s Eve was one of the best things that could have ever happened to me.  He opened my eyes to how I want my life to be.  Sure, some of the eye openings were because he did things that I ended up hating and made me see that there are some things I definitely do not want in my life.  But he also showed me what its like to have someone that loves you, and will take care of you through thick and thin.  He was there for me whenever I needed him to, even if it was just to hold my hand when I was scared of life and everything around me, or at some inopportune moment, but he’d drop everything if I really needed him to.  Generally, I just needed escape, and he gave me that.  He always gave me something else to think about.  When it was more serious and I actually needed someone to tell my darkest secrets to, he listened and helped to his best ability, and that’s really all I could have asked for.  I’ve known I loved him for quite some time now, but it has been more recently that I’ve realized that a little part of me always will.  I didn’t mind taking care of him when he was having a rough day.  I don’t care that he went a little crazy in the end.  I love him, even though he was an asshole sometimes, I wasn’t always the greatest person in return.  I love him, he made me not hate myself, he made me think about me, and my life goals, and what I want later on in life.  This last month of the year is going to be a difficult one for me, I can tell already.

Filed under December personal my year so far.

  1. becca-rex posted this